Forgiveness is hard y'all.
Super stinky hard.
It's often hard to forgive others when they have wronged us and wounded us- even when we know they didn't intentionally mean to hurt us. When we are wounded and weary forgiveness doesn't come easily or quickly. When someone hurts us it's easier to withdraw and pull away from them to to try to repair the trust and relationship. Often we have to just make the choice to forgive over and over and over again until we feel it.
But sometimes I think even harder than forgiving others-it's harder even to forgive ourselves.
To forgive ourselves the way God repeatedly forgives us over and over and over again.
To give ourselves grace and mercy just as we give grace and mercy to those we love.
We torment ourselves thinking about what we could have done, should have done
and although we know God forgives us, we can't (or won't) forgive ourselves.
I think for me it often boils down to the fact that it's the unrealistic expectations
I have of myself and put on myself that is at the root of this inability to forgive myself.
I want to believe that I am better than I am- but the reality is, I'm not.
I am a sinful, imperfect mess that is saved only by the grace and mercy of Christ.
I came across early this morning and loved it so....
But, God calls us to forgive. No matter how hard it is.
Isaiah 44:22 says...
I have swept away your offenses like a cloud, your sins like the morning mist. Return to me, for I have redeemed you.
Psalm 103:12 says...
As far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us.
The song Forgiven by David Crowder is a beautiful reminder that we ARE forgiven.
I've done things I wish I hadn't done
I've seen things I wish I hadn't seen
Just the thought of Your amazing grace
And I cry ”Jesus, forgive me!”
God, I fall down to my knees
with a hammer in my hand
You look at me, arms open
Child there is freedom from all of it
Say goodbye to every sinYou are forgiven!