Sunday, September 15, 2013

How Can I do This?

For the last few weeks I've been working on my list of things that need to be done before we leave for Houston on Monday morning.

My list contained lots of things related to work and lots of things related to home.  I know it probably looked ridiculous to some people because it included things like:
-clean out the pantry
-clean out the refrigerator
-clean out my drawers
-clean out the tupperware cabinet
-get a pedicure
-write down a list of all my passwords
-organize my closet

Most of those things may seem silly but I knew that having all of the closets and drawers cleaned out and everything in it's place would make me feel less stressed- plus it gave me something to do to keep me preoccupied.

But now that list is complete. All of my tasks are checked off.  Short of finishing packing my bag for the hospital, I'm as ready as one can possibly be- at least physically.

However, I keep thinking....how can I do this?

When I can't sleep at night I think about those last few hours before I go into surgery and I wonder.

I wonder.....

  • How do I hold my sweet baby girl and look her in the eyes and tell her it's going to be okay without absolutely falling apart?
  • How do I hug my sweet Daddy and tell him not to worry?
  • How do I kiss my sweet husband knowing how difficult the next 12 hours will be on him?
  • How do I go to sleep not knowing if I will wake up and still be me?
  • How will I handle it if I wake up and my facial nerve has been severed?


I don't know the answer to those questions so I do the only thing I know to do- I pray.

17 comments:

  1. You have touched so many lives, Shannon, both before you shared your story and ever since. You are a woman of faith and a giver of love and kindness. We all lift you up in the days and weeks to come. Breath deeply and know it is not only God who is with you, but those who have known you a life time and those who have known you only briefly. You are loved.

    ReplyDelete
  2. God has your back. Sending hugs.

    ReplyDelete
  3. You are right. Believe. Pray. Trust.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I am sending up prayers along with yours. God will give you the strength to get through those minutes before surgery. He will guide the hands of your surgeon during surgery. And He will give you peace and healing after the surgery. Know that you are cared for and loved and we are all praying for your quick recovery. He will do amazing things!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Prayers for you from NC.
    susanlulu@yahoo.com

    ReplyDelete
  6. I honestly can not tell you how I happened across your blog or what prompted me to start getting your email. But I have been getting the emails since this journey of yours started and can say without a doubt that it has been a blessing to me. Each update leaves me in awe of your faith and courage. I'm one of those strangers that has been praying for you. I can't wait to read each new update you post. I will continue praying for you and your family. I am so thankful to God for putting you in my path.

    ReplyDelete
  7. You are in my prayers! Your strength and faith are such a blessing to me as I get older and struggle with health problems also. Keep trusting God and He will answer those prayers in His way and in His time.

    Blessings to you and your family!

    Deb

    ReplyDelete
  8. Shannon,
    "God is good". And He always will be. I have been praying for you, too, since I stumbled across your blog. God has this and you. I will pray for your family. I so so look forward to your next posts when we can share in your glory to God for your good health.
    Kathy

    ReplyDelete
  9. Many, many people are with you and your family in thought and prayer. You are not alone; we are holding on to you.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Thinking about you and keeping you all in my thoughts and prayers. Much love to you my friend. God Bless.

    ReplyDelete
  11. While reading your post, I was reminded of an old song which says: Many things about tomorrow I don't seem to understand but I know who holds tomorrow and I know who holds my hand.

    Praying that you and your family feel His mighty presence.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Praying for you and your family. Asking the Great Physician to hold you in the palm of His hands, give you peace and strength. And to pour out His greatest blessings on you and your precious family.

    ReplyDelete
  13. I will be praying for you... and your family. :)

    ReplyDelete
  14. I will be praying for you and your family. Philippians 4:13 I can do all things through Christ which strengthens me.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Praying for you! It sounds like you have a powerful group of prayer warriors behind you!

    ReplyDelete